the day someone I didn't know at all died.

Well, technically the day after.

One of my good friends from work lost someone unexpectedly in her close group of friends. And she came to work the next day clearly beside herself in shock and grief. 

Dealing with death is no stranger to me. I've lost a lot of good people in my life. In fact, there was a span of about ten years where I went to at least one funeral a year. I'm pretty sure that's not normal. Needless to say, I was prepared to support her and do anything I could to help.

Except I wasn't ready for how it hit me. And I didn't even know him. 

He was someone's husband.

Marriage is something still so new to me, that I  don't realize there are things in my life that are forever changed because of it. I mean, I know I have a husband. And I am a wife. But the magnitude of that relationship and all that comes with it is really hard to comprehend until you have it.

And I can't even begin to imagine him being gone. 

He was also a good friend. 

I've lost a lot of good people in my time, and consider myself very blessed to have all the amazing people I have in my life currently. But the feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you know you have to go to a funeral to say goodbye to someone you love is quite possibly the worst feeling ever. 

And there are still some days I think I can pick up the phone and call any one of them.

The sadness of those I have lost hit me in a waive watching her grieve. Almost like when you pick a scab and it hurts and bleeds all over again. It's not fair they are gone. And any time I think about the loss of any one of them again, I can't understand it. 

I am blessed to have known them. I know that. They are in a better place. I know that. 

Love the ones you are with, people. You never know when your last conversation will be.

Be the change. Make the difference.